Why we don't go out.

Late yesterday afternoon Rourk called me while he was out doing some errands and said we should go out to dinner. I agreed with just the slightest hint of hesitation. I told myself it would be fun to go out as a family. Yes, let me get the kids ready and we'll go out and enjoy a meal that someone else cooks for a change.

We left the house at 5:14pm. I remember looking at the clock in the van. I know that's early, but that's when one goes out when kids are involved.

We arrive at El Rancho Grande at 5:22pm. Our babysitter works there on Friday nights, so we decided to give it a go.

The first sign of trouble is when Ryan doesn't want to sit in a highchair and insists on sitting next to me. Okay, so I know he is almost four, but when he doesn't sit in a highchair I have to worry that he is going to climb under or over the table. The anxiety starts as soon as he sits down. We immediately give him a few Goldfish. He immediately wants the fork and knife so he can play pirate. There's a brief battle. I win. He pouts.

We order our food. I secretly wonder if we should place it as a to go order.

We talk to the babysitter.

They bring us our food.

During all of the above Ryan has been playing games with his Goldfish. His favorite is to round them up into a little pile and crush them. He also likes to see how much salt and pepper he can dump on the table. And a new game just for the evening: hitting his cup against the wall.

Lilly wants more sweet tea. She whines when she doesn't get what she wants from us.

Ryan complains that his chicken and fries are too hot. He refuses to eat, but continues to make a mess on the table.

Lilly eats Ryan's food.

Rourk and I are eating as fast as we can and running interference with the kids. "Stop that." "Eat that." "Don't do that." "No." This is what our dinner conversation consists of.

We finish at approximately 6:10pm. Rourk leaves the waiter a great tip because of the mess on and under the table.

Ryan NOW decides he wants his fries.

When we get into the car Rourk and I both talk about how tired we are and that we hardly spoke to each other at all. There was no adult conversation. We're at least laughing and happy that we didn't have everyone in the restuarant looking at us because of a tantrum.

We get home at 6:24pm.

And that's why we don't go out to eat anymore.