Tuesday, April 21, 2009


Ryan has an IEP tomorrow. This one has been called because Ryan is eligible to enter kindergarten in the fall. Rourk and I have decided that Ryan will continue at the Meyer Center, but that still doesn't exempt him or us from having to jump through the many hoops associated with the process.

Anyway, I sat down this afternoon and read the report prepared by the school psychologist. I learned a long time ago to not let Ryan's cognitive, social and physical delays get to me, but admit it was hard to read "very deficient" and "at risk" scattered about the pages of this newest report. I kept my perspective and told myself that on any given day Ryan might respond differently-he might say more, he might say less, or he might choose to say nothing at all. That's just how Ryan rolls!

But I came to the conclusion that if a total stranger read the report they'd think Ryan was barely functional. The Ryan described there is not the child that I know and that's the frustrating part about these types of reports. They're a glimpse; they are a few pages of fancy vocabulary words used to sum up my child and that really pisses me off. Sorry, but that's the best word I could come up with to describe my feelings and believe me I tried to substitute others.

Okay, yes, I know that Ryan is delayed; he's significantly delayed, but I dare say that if 100 typically developing 5 year old children participated in the same evaluation process many if not most would show some degree of cognitive, social, emotional and even physical delay. I also know that Ryan has to be tested (I guess) but all I am saying is that it just seems like there should be a better way.

You want to know the funny part? I had to complete a behavioral evaluation on Ryan. While completing it I struggled with how to respond, because it was multiple choice and I didn't think the answers pertained to Ryan in many areas, but I did my best to be honest and picked the closest one for each question. As a result Ryan was found to be "at risk" for aggression. AGGRESSION! For the life of me I can't figure out what I marked on the assessment that would support this. I am definitely going to ask for clarification tomorrow and even for a re-assessment if necessary. That's ludicrous. If it had said Ryan was at risk of running out in traffic I would have thought that was dead on, but not aggression. Hmmm....I guess that time he pushed Lilly down because she took his drink is finally catching up with him. Big brother must be watching.


Kelly said...

We just went though AnnaKate's preschool evaluation stuff even though we are staying at the Meyer Center. I felt the same way...like I was jumping through hoops.

We all know our children and we know deep in our hearts what they can and can't do. But we don't dwell on the can'ts and we move ahead. An IEP seems to dwell on the negative and I just dismiss them.


Jen said...

Well, that just goes to show how completely ridiculous the whole thing is.

You should be pissed off. We all should be. The entire process smacks of judgment and one-sidedness and bureaucracy. I wonder if these people have ever heard the saying "the whole is more than the sum of its parts"?

Ryan deserves better. Good luck tomorrow.

amy jean said...

Your child is creative, eager to learn and loving. He finds the wonder in everything, He loves his sister, his parents, and is surrounded by family and friends who love him. He surprises people daily with what he knows and what he can do.

Those are just a few of the ways I can describe a little boy who is an angel to so many. Those are the things you read and base his development and education on. Not the words of someone who measures based on a few hours and questions on a page.

He is an angel and is capable of things beyond our comprehension.

tammy franks said...

My daughter is 19,and for 17 of those years I have been dealing with schools , she also went to the Meyer's center (loved that place)I was told once by one of those school docs that Jessica was depressed..LOL if you knew my daughter that is like saying I am thin LOL..(size30)BUT YOU have to remember this is how the schools get funding for our kids, The kids have to fit some special mold so the school gets thier big bucks to pay for those programs.I use to leave IEP's in tears.BUT NOW I jump though the hoops and play the game and Jessica gets what she needs.I hope your son gets to go to reg 4K and get them to mainstream as much as you can. IT helped Jessica more then anything. now she takes GYM and English and computers with the other kids in junior year.GOOD LUCK and always remember you are not alone!!!!

Anne said...

I hope you meeting went well.

(I have to use the "handicapped" version of word verification when leaving in a comment in Blogger. Do you think I need an I. E. P.?)

Dava said...

We had Bryn's IEP today. What pissed me off was this statement under adaptive skills: "She needs asssitance with opening certain packages at lunch and frequently gets food on her face and clothes."

Are you kidding me...what is the purpose for even including this and please look around the lunch room.

She is reading!!! Which many of her peers that will be entering first grade next year aren't.

There were many other things but that was the one that just sent me over the edge!

Roxann said...

My daughter Stacey often feels the same way about these reports. So hard to read and so frustrationg. Found your link on Stacey's blog. Longs Joyful Journey. Your children are beautiful. I love the picture with the worm.